Wonderful news. A ned called me slick! Why am I overjoyed? Well Ive not been called that for at least 10 years and its a treat not to be called Franz Ferdinand.

The lad was obviously trying to impress his schoolgirl girlfriend, being manly by trying to make me angry. Thank you son, I hope your career in nedism is fruitful for you in your ned world..

Here is one that slightly annoyed me: well actually it has annoyed me so much it is tonight’s post.

I ask you reader, is the word ‘ Chinky ‘ as used for calling a Chinese take away an affectionate Glasgow slang term? Or is it institutionally racist?

I suspect the latter.

Ive been posting on a forum that promotes Glasgow. A lot of my posts on there have been light-hearted and I confess to indulging in a little crude humour laced with colourful metaphors. Anyway, a poster used the word ‘ chinky ‘ when describing buying a take away. After reading his post, I asked if maybe he should reconsider his choice of wording.

He did not wish to change it, nor did the moderator of the forum seem to agree that it is actually offensive. The poster, bless him posts a rant as to how angry I made him because he has Asian friends. Good for him.

My posts in reply to how I believed it was racist were deleted, his original post remained for a day or two. What is worse is that the moderator was on my personal MSN Messenger list, and for reasons she wont explain, has now blocked me and put me on ignore. (I did ask her what the problem was, but I never got a reply ) I dont get it, I dont get people sometimes.

The fact of the matter is that ‘ chinky ‘ is not Glasgow slang, nor is it quaint Stanley Baxter Parliamo Glasgow-speak. Its an example of institutionalised racism. That is the way it is perceived these days.

A forum that wishes to promote Glasgow and allow postings using those terms without being (in my and many other’s view ) properly moderated should remain hidden. I’m no big lover of Glasgow these days, but its not good promotion is it?

You know, I’m in the wrong job and I have the wrong ambitions in life. The real ambitions have been staring back at me in the mirror for the last 14 or so years.

I should become famous for looking like several famous people at once. I could earn so much money. How unique is that? I was in Glasgow city centre today and I was called by several groups of youths and students Franz Ferdinand, Elvis, Alex Kapranos ( yeah I know he is the lead man for Franz Ferdinand ) and the most incredible of all, Michael Jackson.

Was I wearing something so flamboyant that made people call me these famous names? I was wearing a yellow shirt, black tie, grey trousers and white shoes.

Michael Jackson though. I’m puzzled. I need to know the reasons behind that one.

This could only happen in Glasgow..

I usually travel around these days by taxi, especially in the evenings as the current operators of the dear green place’s buses are unreliable.

However, after my final hospital visit, I did not have enough money on me for the return journey home, so I walked along Alexandra Parade to find the nearest ATM. Unfortunately it was out of order which forced me to go on a pilgrimage to Duke Street where there are ATMs a plenty.

Duke Street these days is not the same place where I spent my school lunchtimes. Now its infested with youths who just wish to cause trouble with anyone who walks by them on their street corner or bus shelter. It no longer has any soul, and it made me feel a bit uneasy.

As I waited for a taxi, I realised I couldn’t be bothered with waiting, especially as I saw the bus which could get me home ready to stop at the bus stop. So I decided to get the bus home.

The bus was empty for most of the journey and as it neared my destination, the bus ground to a sudden stop and the bus driver came out of his cabin and looked rather worried and upset.

The good curious Samaritan in me asked him if anything was wrong. In a Polish accent he replied ‘ I am so sorry, I do not know where I am going. ‘

If your a passenger on a bus, and the driver mentions he doesn’t know where he is going, then I guess like me, you would be rather concerned and a tad annoyed at the revelation above. First Bus are recruiting foreign drivers ( especially from Poland ) which is a nice idea and rather refreshing from the usual grumpy Glaswegian drivers one has to put up with these days.

Anyway. The driver was a young chap, and he seemed to be distressed. I told him to calm down and to give me his route timetable. I had a quick glance over it and told him that he was 10 mins early so I could easily show him the way to the terminus without rushing.

He was thankful for this and I wished him well in his job after we arrived at the terminus.

I thought that First Bus would immerse their foreign drivers in Glasgow routes before being allowed on the roads. I dread to think what would have happened during rush hour. More than likely, that poor driver would have been abused either verbally or physically.

Now, I remember the halcyon days of the GPTE and the Corporation. Beautiful dressed buses in splendid colours, always clean and tidy. More importantly, the were usually on time.

Why do some things have to change?